Replying to a commenter The Grill Friend I love this ques…

Transcript

So we were talking about not being a performative retiree, and Max asked the question, well, how do we share fun stories about things we do in our retirement without it coming off as performative? And I'm gonna give you two answers, Max. I'm gonna give you the first one, which I'll guarantee you is wrong. And it's what I would tell you from my heart, because I'm nuts. And then I'm gonna give you a second answer that I think is probably how most emotionally balanced people would look at it. My first answer, the nuts one, is this. If you're a person like me, who calculates everything they say based on what impact it'll have on someone else, then it's performative if your intent was to elicit some response or reaction. It's not performative if you accidentally had a moment of truly sharing how you felt about something, and you're just excited and telling a story. I don't think that's right. I think that's a person who has completely untethered their needs in the moment and anchored everything they say to some future outcome. And I don't think that's healthy. The second answer I'll give you, which is what I think a lot of people would say, is just tell your story. And if the people around you care about you, they'll be happy that you're excited and you're telling your story. And if they know you and they love you, they'll be like, Max isn't bragging. You know, Max isn't trying to perform, like trying to show how, you know, cool their life is or whatever. Max is just happy. Max, you know, wanted to tell a fun story about something they did. So I don't have right answers. I say that all the time on here. I just have my experiences. And I would say my experience with people who seem well-balanced would be, say what you're feeling. And if it comes off as performative, that's on the room, not the speaker. Good luck, Max. Thanks.